Long distance relationship advice: 4 warning signs
1. They won’t pick up the phone
When you’re in a long distance relationship communication is key. Of course, communication is key in any relationship, but when distance separates you picking up the phone or chatting on Skype becomes more important than ever.
But, if your other half just doesn’t seem to be willing to put in the work, then you should be on your guard. Dropping you the odd text before bedtime doesn’t count either – we’re firm believers in regular conversations, preferably over the phone, between people in a long distance relationship. Texts are just too easy to send, and are also far too open to interpretation. An LDR takes work, and if the other person in the relationship can’t be bothered or doesn’t want to pick up the phone at the end of the day to find out how you are, then maybe they’re just not as invested as you’d hoped.
2. They won’t compromise
Relationships are all about compromise, and a long distance relationship should be no different. But if your partner won’t visit you one weekend because they have a 5-a-side match, or because they want to have Sunday lunch with their mates then they might need to rethink their priorities. It’s essential that both parties are willing to put in effort to a long distance relationship, and if that means forgoing other pleasures then that’s the way it has to be. If your partner doesn’t seem willing to put you first, then one or both of you might need to rethink your priorities, or your relationship.
3. They suddenly change how or when they get in touch
If your other half has suddenly changed how or how often they communicate with you, you should question why. Maybe that early morning call has petered out, or they no longer log online in the evening to have a post-work chat.
Of course, if your partner has a new job, or new commitments that have changed the course of their day then you can expect upheaval, but if there’s no reason for this change in behaviour then you should be prepared to ask why. Is it because they no longer have the time? They can’t be bothered? They don’t feel you appreciate it? Have the conversation, before the situation gets out of hand.
4. They suddenly become needy
We all have our down days, and in a long distance relationship that can lead to a bit of neediness; maybe the odd text saying you could really do with a hug, or a moany ‘I miss you soooooo much’ phone call. But, if your other half is suddenly displaying this behaviour all the time, consider it a red flag. If they can’t cope without you for even a few days, it suggests their lives are somewhat empty and they’re using you to fill it. Whether they need new job, a hobby or some friends, a situation where one partner is totally dependent and focused on the other person doesn’t work in any relationship, especially a long distance one.
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