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At eHarmony we are committed to helping singles find love. Every one of us is different, and for widows and widowers dating has particular challenges and unique rewards. Whether you’re a widow or a widower or you’re dating someone whose previous partner has died, these are sensitive issues, and acknowledging them requires an open mind and a kind heart.
Remember not to make assumptions about people’s situations. Widows and widowers may be young or old, and their previous relationship may have been a difficult one or it may have been wonderful and fulfilling. So it’s important to understand right from the start that someone who has experienced the death of a partner has gone through a profound experience. They may not want to share everything immediately and there may be some things a new partner will never know. That doesn’t mean a new partner can’t be a source of fulfilment and joy in their own right.
How eHarmony works
At eHarmony we are dedicated to helping you find love, whatever your situation. Our years of scientific research into what makes relationships successful tell us that compatibility is the key.
With eHarmony you can state your own preferences, but it goes much deeper than that. Our Compatibility Matching System™ allows us to match members who share core beliefs, attitudes and personality traits – the factors that are really important in building successful relationships.
We do this by really getting to know you. When you sign up to eHarmony, you fill in our Relationship Questionnaire, and with the results we put together your Personality Profile. We send you the profile and compatible matches straight to your inbox – for free.
We believe it’s important for you to see what you can get out of our service before deciding whether you want to take things further. If you do, our Guided Communication tool can help you start talking to other members comfortably and securely and provide an easy way to get to know someone special.
When is the right time?
Widows and widowers may hold back from dating because they’re not sure they’re ready for a new relationship. Sometimes it’s because they still feel raw from the experience of bereavement. Other times it might be because they want to preserve the memory of their old relationship. While these reasons are of course understandable, there comes a time when they could be holding someone back and preventing them from seeking the happiness they deserve.
Other people’s emotions and attitudes can play a part in the decision about when and how to begin dating again. If a widow or widower has young children who are struggling to come to terms with loss, then supporting them is likely to be the remaining parent’s first priority. But that does not mean they should neglect their own emotional needs. Sometimes the decision to move on can be a great inspiration and source of comfort and relief to everyone around.
When widows and widowers do start dating again, there are certain issues that need some thought. Often these are a question of perspective. Widowed dating requires first and foremost the desire to be yourself again, and to trust your own instincts about what you need right now.
Dating someone who has lost a partner requires sensitivity, and everyone’s situation will be different. For example, dating a widower with children can mean a woman finds herself being expected to take on childcare responsibilities she hadn’t bargained for. An understanding approach is necessary, and with it may come the glimmering of a new and respectful relationship in which both partners’ emotional needs are met.
One common issue arises when someone who is divorced starts dating a widow or a widower. It may be tempting to think the loss of a partner is enough to bring two people together, but that is not always the case. Widows and widowers sometimes observe that new partners who have experienced divorce or separation can initially find it harder dating someone who had a previously happy relationship that only ended because of bereavement. If the couple can talk about the issues and work through them, they’re likely to emerge from the experience with greater emotional maturity and respect for each other.
In all cases genuine compatibility is necessary, and patient understanding is even more important when both partners have suffered loss. This is why all our members fill out our Relationship Questionnaire, ensuring all the matches we send you are deeply compatible and sensitive to your situation.
With so much to think about, online dating can be an important first step back into the world of dating. eHarmony offers a service that widower or widow dating UK users can try from their own homes before deciding whether to take things further, allowing you the personal freedom and space to make new connections, find compatible matches and maybe even choose face-to-face dates – all at a pace that suits you.
For anyone dating again after a loss, time and privacy can be important. By finding someone online with a widow dating service and chatting by email, it’s possible to get to know someone without having to commit to anything you don’t want. And all the while there’s the option to take the relationship to the next level when the time is right.
Choosing a site like eHarmony, which is more than just a widow dating site or a widower dating site, allows you to fully explore all compatibility options and maximises your chance of finding love again. Ultimately, the focus of dating again is your own emotional fulfilment and to regain some fun and enjoyment in your own life. It’s important to look ahead and learn to love life again.
“After my husband died I moved to live closer to my children and wanted to meet new people in my new community. I joined numerous local groups and was trying hard to make a new life for myself but I still found myself without male company. For a while I was resigned to the fact that I’d be solitary forever but after two years I saw an advert for eHarmony on the TV and decided to take action. I liked how eHarmony was more serious and was interested in the in-depth questions asked. I didn’t want to just have someone on my arm, I wanted a companion and I did think about subscribing for a long time before I signed up.”