Comments on: Five things women want in a relationship

By: Paul

Paul — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 12:30:57 +0000

I’ll just add to that, I am not a confident person – at work I am always being told to “Push myself out there” to get on, the same has been said about my lovelife – at a large gathering I’d tend not to push myself “out there” and so I don’t speak to the girl or make the most of any opportunity. So confidence, or in my case, lack of confidence, does make a difference..

By: Paul

Paul — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 12:28:18 +0000

It’s so tough on the internet, I do feel a lot of people are very superfical, and while I don’t look like Brad Pitt I don’t look like the back of a bus either.
I’ve always gone out with women I’ve met and got to know first, the attraction has come later. So I agree with the 5 above, it comes back to compromise also !!

By: Nick

Nick — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 15:28:06 +0000

I agree with the 5 items listed above, however in my experience women can’t stand a “nice” man. Speaking from the heart, honesty, peacemaker attidtude and emotional stability are all very important. However, they can not come at the expense of confidence. If a man exibits a lack confidence, then all of the above are either redundant, or overshaddowed. Unfortunately for those who do lack some confidence, it just seems to take women a little longer to realise this, by which time it tends to be more than somewhat painful.

By: Renetia

Renetia — Mon, 07 Mar 2011 13:33:05 +0000

A man who treats a woman like a lady/princess. I think your two points of honesty & peacemaker are sort of the same thing… if you are honest & value honesty you own up & that includes to your own faults or wrong doing.
I so agree with speaking from the heart. Most men are afraid of opening up & revealing which reflects a fear of intimacy. Also agree with attractiveness. Make the effort & you will get noticed which doesn’t translate to losing your individuality.

By: Andrew

Andrew — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 16:34:08 +0000

I have to take issue with Shirley’s comment on women wanting men to make them laugh. It’s true it commonly features strongly on a woman’s wish-list but from a male point of view it seems shallow and suggests that women want their men to be comedians. Yes, it is important that a gentleman has the ability to put a lady at her ease and this is an important part of establishing a relationship. However, it is rare to see a request from a man for a woman to make him laugh. Humour can very easily go wrong and so is well down the pecking order. I think that honesty, trust and courtesy are more important attributes in the early stages of a (potential) relationship and when these are established there is plenty of time to make each other laugh.

By: Shirley

Shirley — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 16:31:51 +0000

This is an interesting analysis of what we women say we want according the profiles we’ve compiled on EH. To some extent it sounds valid but it has a strong focus on all the worthy attributes (plus looks) with little space for fun. Most women I know always mention a sense of humour and a man’s essential ability to make them laugh and feel at ease in their company so I am surprised our profiles are not reflecting this.
Personally I think I am on the site looking for the ying to my yang (or vice versa). I’d agree that honesty/trust would be my no 1 (same with all my relationships not just the special one). But I loved the way Denis Thatcher handled his relationship with Margaret – he was a successful businessman who commanded personal self-respect but he was also discreet,self-possessed and supportive of his high profile spouse. Are there more gentlemen out there who have a subtle dynamism while letting their other half shine in her more extrovert chosen profession? This personal self-confidence/self-esteem would be my second requirement. If he looked like Phil Jupitus it would be a bonus! (not everyone is after George Clooney).