Thanks for your comments. I think you’re referring to the ‘Something to Talk About’ section. This lets you choose what your interests are, and we will show you if your matches have the same interests as you. We don’t use this section to actually match you – that is based purely on the Relationship Questionnaire you filled out when you joined, and your own personal preferences (distance, age etc.) There aren’t any questions about which sports you like to watch or play in the questionnaire.

With ‘Something to Talk About’ there is the option to choose both the sports you like to watch and the sports you like to play. However, if any of this is unclear, please either ask any more questions or call our Customer Care team on 0800 028 0308.

Hope this helps.

Best wishes,
Emily
eHarmony Advice

On the article topic, previous relationships are bound to invite comment. As long as it’s measured and rational then things could well be fine. If you find yourself (or your date) face down in tears in the main course, inconsolable about ‘the one’ that got away well then yeah, that clearly isn’t but with any luck such instances will be rare. (And if it did happen, just think of the story you can tell your next date!) People are going to want know a bit about each other, not least why they chose to take the plunge on a dating website. It’s very much a more ‘active’ endeavour than the passive meeting people through people. If you’ve just come out of a relationship and are trying to move on, saying it out loud could be another step towards much needed closure.

(Little bit close to home, that last comment…)

To sign, or not to sign. Dunno. Whaddya say?

My experience so far one week into EH, talk to one man for a while, first date was good he was funny and interesting second date he tells me his ex lives with him and worst of all he told herhe was on a date and so, a million texts in one hour. You know the rest, I did not need to use the toilet window I just told him never ever contact me again.

I thought this was a mature dating site, thats is why I have withdrawn by subscription.

I am one of the “free weekenders” (otherwise known as “tight wads” and other charming adjectives). I looked at the site to see whether it was any different to many other similar sites. The questioning and psychological basis of the site is interesting but what overwhelmed me was the number of responses I got … literally hundreds of contacts. I wrote to eHarmony telling them to stop sending so many and as they did not respond I shunted the emails off to my spam folder.

The second reason for not joining in was that I am in the middle of a difficult family dispute and this family dispute impacted unfavourably on an on-going relationship which is now dissolved.

I would hope that there are many woman of my age (60) or around that vintage on the site but I am not able to maintain a relationship at this time as I do not have the time or capacity to devote the required energy to a new potential partner.

At sea, living in the desert, and working hard in unsocial occupations coupled with a self sacrificing attitude to work I have learned to live alone and have done so for much of my life.

Self reliant, confident, resourceful, sometimes arrogant, often humble in the face of others pain, I cannot see how a personal relationship is possible again. After three marriages and many girlfriends I think I have already met you all (there’s that arrogance!).

I am sorry that so many of you have had nothing but silence after emailing me but perhaps now you can gain an insight into why I am not right for you.

A non-answer might be the best escape you could hope for, and a tight wad I am not. I have my own successful business, and own my house and car, so with few of the expenses that a younger man may have I can easily afford to pay the fee demanded.

So I ask that you do not consider the “free weekenders” or the lurkers as decendants of Silas Marner or as total misanthropes … they just might not be ready for a new relationship … yet.