Dating and relationship advice you can really believe in.

Since the dawn of time men and women have tried – and failed – to second guess each other. Women have been known to spend hours trying to work out exactly why a man has behaved the way he has, pondering ‘What was he thinking?’

Of course, the answer to ‘What was he thinking?’ is actually an endless list as, contrary to what some women seem to believe, men are just as complex as they are. But we’ve picked out six key things men would love to say to women, and explain how they impact the opposite sex.

And for the Gentlemen reading this, we’re eager for more examples of things you’d love to say to women, so please leave them in the comments below (anonymously, if you wish!).

1.    “It’s not that I’m scared of committing to you, I just want to be 100% sure”
A recent study from the US asked 12,000 men and women, aged 15-44,  ‘It is better to get married than go through life single?’. The result? 66% of men and only 51% of women agreed. Men aren’t that scared of walking down the aisle; it’s more that women like to think they are because it’s an easy explanation. The fact is that if a wonderful woman comes along whom they fall in love with, most men can’t wait to make a big commitment.

2.    “Just because I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings”
When women get together to discuss the actions of the menfolk in their lives, the men often come out of it pretty badly. One of the big generalisations is that men are unemotional and oblivious to the feelings of others. And while this may be true of some men – just as it is true of some women – it’s unfair to characterise all men like this. Films, TV, and men’s magazines (to name just a few) tell men that it’s not ‘manly’ to show their feelings. So, when they hold back, who can blame them? The emotionally intelligent woman gives a man the time and space to process his feelings, and doesn’t pressure him into expressing them until he want to.

3.    “Just because I like sex doesn’t make me some kind of sex-fiend”
That old statistic about men thinking about sex every 7 seconds is basically a load of rubbish. According to the Kinsey Institute, 54% of men think about sex every day, or several times a day, 43% a few times a month/few times per week, and 4% think about sex less than once a month. That stereotype of men being governed by their sexual desires, unable to think about anything else, needs to change. Generally speaking both men and women like to think about sex, but both genders prefer to think about it – and do it – when the time is right, with the right person.

4.    “The male ego is as delicate as you’ve been told it is. Handle with care.”
The male ego exists and it’s a fragile thing.  While it can be easily massaged, it’s also easily damaged, and women should handle with care. By all means women should be honest with their men, but be tactful so as not to puncture that ego – after all, it works both ways.

5.    “I’m scared that you’ll tie me down if we get serious”
Broadly speaking, men fear being tied down more than women. They fear the time they have to tell their football buddies that they’re missing the match because their girlfriend wants them to visit her sister. This all goes back to point number one – they need to be sure before they commit to a woman. And in turn that woman needs to reassure the man that she’s not going to be laying down the law all over the place once he does commit.

6.    “I want to share my thoughts and feelings with you…without getting an off-the-scale reaction”
We suggested above that men are less inclined to talk about their feelings – something both sexes would probably agree with. But, that’s not to say they never want to share with their partners. Many men avoid talking about things because they’re worried the woman in their life will go off the deep end.  Ladies, dial down your reaction when your partner starts to speak, at least until he’s managed to get whatever he needs to off his chest.