Comments on: What NOT to say in your ‘About Me’ profile

By: Phil

Phil — Sun, 12 Jun 2011 19:10:34 +0000

All good points made. Spelling is difficult to get write even with spell chequers, do you sea what I’m saying? I tend to think the way you fill out your profile says exactly what you are like when you filled it out so perhaps reviewing it regularly will make you change some things. If you love your kids/dogs/geraniums so much that they are your focus in life, and you mention that everywhere in your profile, thanks for doing that, your matches prefer honesty.

By: x

Wed, 20 Apr 2011 19:19:19 +0000

it’s so disgusting and it makes me physically sick that people focus on the very things that do no matter. For goodness sakes, EH is meant to help us find “the right person”. If you guys/ladies are looking for mr & mrs perfect, or looking for someone who has never made mistakes, then you might as well put up an ad. in the newspapers and ask people to send their application letters to you!
the most important thing is Love and your ability to communicate effectively with your partner and not flimsy excuses like he/she made spelling mistakes when they sent me an email or they did not use the appropriate puctuation marks or the email was not well paragraphed!! Is EH now an english language school or a dating website? someone please tell me!!
You could have someone send you all the wonderful emails in the world with no spelling mistakes at all, but when you meet that person, you might just find they were just empty barrels who knew only how to make noise.
Having said all of this, I am not at all impressed with EH, feels like i’ve just wasted my money. Only 1 macth ever since i joined. This match initiated contact, i reply, then no response!! you never really know these things until they happen to you. I have read people’s experiences on EH about how contact was initiated and then no response from the person who initiated the contact when you reply!
Maybe i made spelling mistakes:):) or maybe my grammar was not up to my match’s standard, or maybe i used a comma instead of a full stop at the end of a sentence, so they decided not to reply my email!! Frankly, i’m not bothered, because, it’s their loss!! I believe who ever i end up dating/getting married to will be the better for it. I am not being big headed here, just that i know my value, I know what i’m worth and I know I deserve to be treated with respect!!
Anyway, thought i’d you this medium to say a big thanks but no thanks to EH sending me a match who i’m not sure is dead or alive:):)
think i’ve said enough for now and i do feel better actually.
and to all you nit picky english language scholars out there who look out for spelling mistakes and grammar, i think i have some work for you. Have a look at my comment and feel free to correct any spelling mistakes and grammatical errors as i couldn’t just be bothered!!!!

By: Erin

Erin — Tue, 08 Feb 2011 00:04:30 +0000

Michael at number 4 may like to know “occurrence” is actually spelled with a double “r” and not just the one!! Think you fell on ur own sword there M!

By: eHarmony

eHarmony — Mon, 07 Feb 2011 17:35:04 +0000

Hi Sue,

You can change your location by following these steps:

1) Log into your eHarmony account: http://www.eharmony.co.uk
2) Click on the My Settings tab, then the ‘Distance’ tab beneath that
3) Here you can change your postcode, town and how far you’d like to search for your matches

Hope this helps!

Best wishes,
Emily
eHarmony Advice

By: Sue

Sue — Mon, 07 Feb 2011 17:15:43 +0000

I would like to be able to change my location to that of the nearby city rather than the small village where I live. All people who live here are believed to be rich. There are some footballers in the big houses but mine is very small and it and I have been here longer than the footballers and their mansions. I think this might attract people who are interested in me for the wrong reasons Why can I not change my location?

By: Talula

Talula — Mon, 17 Jan 2011 01:35:27 +0000

I still haven’t worked out how to view profiles so I can’t comment about others’ spelling. With regard to photographs, I deliberately posted a photograph taken from behind as my second picture as I felt it only fair to show potential suitors that I have dreadlocks – this photograph was not approved.

By: Andrew

Andrew — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 18:28:02 +0000

Well, for what it’s worth, here are my points:
1. Minimal profiles suggest minimal enthusiasm for the process and who’s going to bother someone who really can’t be asked?
2.Poor spelling, weak grammar, dull prose – unless someone is clearly not English (in which case it can be quite endearing and admirable that they are communicating on such a site in a second language) also suggests someone who really can’t be asked. Incredibly, there are people who send in job applications of similarly poor quality and wonder why they never get jobs; online dating is a process of sending out positive and negative messages which people make judgements and this is one of those messages.
3. I really appreciate people putting on lots of photos but can live without the group shots which make it hard to identify you, photos of animals, anything to do with anyone in a skiing scenario or showing off generally.
4. Agree with the ‘baking’ comments but find the over the top remarks about one’s kids unnecessary; if you’re a parent it’s taken as read that your kids will have transformed your life and very likely they are the most important things in your life. Just spare us the details.
5. Hate the ice-breakers – why can we not write our own with a 20 word limit?
6. Think the App is great but often crashes when writing emails – possibly a timing out issue?
7. Am shocked at the numer of males apparently using inappropriate references to sex. Equally, however, I’m very cynical about women who claim they would give everything to just meet a man with a decent sense of humour they can trust blah blah. Who are they kidding – only themselves, maybe?

Good luck, take the rough with the smooth and why not take a chance now and again and just go for it?

By: Polly

Polly — Sat, 01 Jan 2011 20:18:51 +0000

A humourous aside: I keep getting messages from ‘gentlemen’ who put down in their ‘passionate about’ section: ‘the environment and sex…’ and then manage to get the sex bit two or three times in other sections. I thought this was an up-market kind of dating site. It surely goes without saying that most people do see sex as part of a loving relationship and it does not need to be emphasised in a profile, also makes me doubt whether they could actually be trusted with my friends etc. I do sometimes reply to these messages with the entreaty to join ‘Smooch’ or one of the other more salacious dating sites. Gotta laugh though, eh?

By: Mandy

Mandy — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 23:03:22 +0000

After being a disillusioned member for the last couple of months, I’ve just had the most entertaining half hour reading these threads.
Relieved to hear I’m not alone on here! Curious why after hunting down the hidden door to communication with site owners, my email didn’t get a reply within 48 hrs as promised to others above? And what’s happened to the app? A blank blue screen for the last couple of days.
Sounds like I’m committing most of the sins on my profile – guess I should have mentioned my passion for illiterate men? Oh if only… Only 2 more weeks before I jump ship and marry my dog. Good luck fellow singletons.

By: Cat

Cat — Mon, 15 Nov 2010 21:31:09 +0000

Fill out your profile in full. I’ve seen profiles where half the sections have been missed out and the rest consist of two or three words. Obviously there are a couple of sections where a couple of words are appropriate but most need longer answers. This, combined with a photo, creates a better, more interesting profile.

By: Rob

Rob — Sun, 14 Nov 2010 20:02:51 +0000

Definately agree with the “no negativity”. I’ve seen quite a few profiles talking about their Ex and why they split up… BIG TURN OFF!

This article helped me reduce my profile down to something more appealing, as I noticed I went on about some things in too much detail. Mention something, but don’t go into too much detail, it creates curiosity and may prompt a potential to communicate! Leave the intricate details till you meet so you have something to talk about!

By: Roddy

Roddy — Sun, 14 Nov 2010 18:32:39 +0000

Okay i know good spelling and grammar is
considered to be the be all and end all
of life as we know it! but,and heres the big BUT can some people get of their self righteous “iam an educated indivdual and therefore better than you” horse before it receives a bullet beteen the eyes! Perhaps you should practise being a little less judgemental. I recently have experienced grammar and speeling mistakes in a letter form a professional who earns £35,000 a year and perhaps one would think they should be able to spell? And i might add it was a lady too.Not that it matters too much.

By: eharmony

eharmony — Mon, 08 Nov 2010 10:13:46 +0000

Hi David,

Thanks for getting in touch. If you’re completed the questionnaire and your profile you should be receiving matches. However, I’m going to forward your comments onto our Customer Care team who will be in touch, via email, shortly. They will be able to check your account to make sure there are no technical issues.

In the meantime there are two things you can do:

1. When you are logged in, on your Home tab, on the left hand side there is a header that says ‘Match settings’. Underneath that there is a line that says ‘Matching is..’ and this will be followed by either ‘On’ or ‘Off’. Make sure this is saying ‘On’

2. Under your My Matches tab, at the top, on the right hand side, there is a link that says ‘Find new matches’. Clicking this will ‘push’ any new matches you have waiting (we send you a few matches a day to help you get to know your matches at an even pace – this will send you any matches that are waiting for you for the following day)

Best wishes,
eHarmony Advice

By: David

David — Sun, 07 Nov 2010 13:44:21 +0000

Hi, I took over an hour to complete my profile and set a search for “anywhere in the entire world” to find my match and even though there are supposedly 12 million profiles on here I didnt get a single match… Kind of sent down in the dumps for a while there, Ive had no issues with relationships in the past, surely this cant be normal?

By: Steve, Manchester

Steve, Manchester — Tue, 26 Oct 2010 23:00:05 +0000

I agreed Heather, if someone is committed to finding a relationship then they will put a decent photo up and a date on it. Otherwise they aren’t making the effort.

By: Heather

Heather — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 08:44:24 +0000

I have a comment with regard to people not posting photographs. I feel it tends to smack a little of voyerism and makes me very uncomfortable as a woman when men do not post their photos and yet are more than happy to view me! Do they have a hidden agenda? After all it is an ideal place for such people. I don’t see why it can’t be a requirement to post a photo – having said that anyone can post anything…..

By: Cat

Cat — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 20:04:16 +0000

Well if baking is all she’s got going for her then yes, I probably am. However, if there are other things in her profile that someone finds attractive then she may get lucky. Who knows, she may find someone in real life.

By: Steve, Manchester

Steve, Manchester — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 19:17:39 +0000

I don’t believe those profiles where they say they do extreme sports! I think they make it up! People sometimes embellish! I met a girl who said in her profile profession she was an actress. In person she even said “I’m an actress by trade”. It turned out, after a few questions, she was unemployed and had done a panto a couple of times.

“cinema, museums/art galleries, the occasional night out at bars/pubs”
- same stuff I’m into. I’d say that is the most common things people are into and in a profile is likely to get a lot of hits.

I hope the girl finds a man who is finds baking a hot topic. I suspect you are being overly optimistic thinking it will work out for her!

By: Cat

Cat — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 18:57:39 +0000

Interesting is relative. What interests one person will bore someone else to sleep.
Personally, I’m not looking for someone who jets off to go snowboarding every other weekend. I’d never see them if they did. I’m quite happy for someone to say that they like the cinema, museums/art galleries, the occasional night out at bars/pubs. To somebody else that could sound boring. As for the woman who bakes, maybe she’ll get matched with a chef who loves to cook/bake and would like to share that love with someone else.

By: Steve, Manchester

Steve, Manchester — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 22:52:20 +0000

They are supposed to say something interesting!

I like to take a really nice hot shower but I don’t list that on my profile!

I know of no men who will be looking on a dating site for anyone who lists that they “like to bake”. I’m suggesting this person has something in her profile which will ensure minimal or no interest.

By: Cat

Cat — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 21:26:24 +0000

So what are people supposed to say? It’s no good saying you like something you don’t because it sounds exciting. Besides *you* don’t want to hear that someone likes to bake. Some others may not mind it and at least that way you can eliminate that match before wasting your time and money on meeting that person.

By: Steve, Manchester

Steve, Manchester — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 15:50:02 +0000

Another example of what not to say in your profile “I like to bake” and worse, the profile I read it in mentioned it more than once. No, us men don’t want to hear about your thrilling baking sessions.

By: eharmony

eharmony — Mon, 11 Oct 2010 11:20:17 +0000

Hi Shelly,

I’m sorry you’re having problems logging into your account. I’ve forwarded your queries onto our Customer Care team who will be in touch within 48 hours.

If you would like help immediately, please call our Customer Care team directly on 0800 028 0308 (Mon-Fri, 8am-8pm)

Best wishes,
eHarmony Advice

By: Steve, Manchester

Steve, Manchester — Sun, 10 Oct 2010 18:07:51 +0000

Alyson, I don’t think you can conclude that everyone on the site is going to be unsuitable for you just because of stuff you read here! And your comment was a bit out of order, everyone is entitled to have likes/dislikes without being called “anal and up themselves”.

Fran, I’m flattered!

By: Fran

Fran — Sun, 10 Oct 2010 09:18:30 +0000

Steve – I think you should become a counsellor!