Wait to settle down

6 reasons you should wait to settle down

by Eharmony Editorial Team - October 28, 2010

Getting hitched as soon as you can might seem like a good idea when you’re young and in love, but here are 6 reasons why waiting makes sense.

Do you feel pressured to settle down? Racing to tie the knot because everyone else is? There’s no need to rush. Here are 6 reasons why you should wait before making a big commitment

According to the Office of National Statistics, the average age for men and women to marry is now 35. In 1961, this was just 23 for women and 25 for men. It seems we’ve become a nation of singles waiting before settling down. There are many reasons for this; women are more independent, with career paths to follow, and there’s less emphasis on marriage or settling down in society in general.

And that’s no bad thing. Not everyone wants to be ‘tied down’ at an early age. We’re not saying that if you did get married at 22 you made a mistake, different things work for different people. But if you’re still looking for that special someone, here are six reasons why waiting isn’t such a bad thing after all.

1. Maturity leads to happier marriages

The older you are, the less likely you are to divorce. The maturity that comes with age can help bring life into perspective and allow you to make better choices. If you’re older when you marry, you will have had more experiences and a better understanding of what matters (and what doesn’t) in a relationship.

2. Age doesn’t equal emotional baggage

As we get older, we have more experiences and we can get hurt. But if you learn from those knocks and mistakes then you become so much more emotionally mature and aware. Baggage doesn’t need to be a bad thing – it can represent everything you’ve learned about life.

3. You can make better choices

The older you get, the more you know what you want from life. This helps you to make better partner choices. Your romantic relationships, friendships and family ties all help you get to know the kind of people you get on with – and the kind that rub you up the wrong way. That way, you’ll be able to see past the initial attraction when you meet someone new and concentrate on what really matters.

4. You are a better version of you

Older often does really mean wiser. We become much more aware of our own faults and our positive qualities as we age. Ultimately, we learn to really like ourselves – a very attractive trait.

5. You know what commitment means

As time goes on, you come to understand the gravity of making a commitment. In your work, friendships and relationships, commitment becomes more important. After all, who wants to employ someone – or be friends with someone – who doesn’t know the meaning of the word commitment?

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6. You have a more secure future

With an established career, savings, and maybe even your own home, your relationship will start on a more secure footing. You’ll hopefully have fewer money worries, which will help you to start a family, if that’s what you want. Put simply, you’re less likely to blow your pay packet on a gadget or designer dress. There’s nothing wrong with waiting to settle down. Sometimes it might feel like your friends are all settling into long-term relationships and leaving you behind, but what really matters, is that you make the right choice for you.

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