Four things not to do on a first date


Jo Middleton of Slummy single mummy revisits some of her least successful first date experiences to share her top things to avoid on a first date if you want to make sure you bag a second.

We all have those dodgy first date experiences we’d rather forget – the woman with the terrible, high-pitched laugh, who spat while she talked, the man who sweated through his shirt and jacket whilst telling stories about his guinea pig collection – we’ve all been there.

Sometimes though, especially if you’ve been dating for a while without much success, it can feel like everyone else is happily coupled off but you, and that you’re the only person left going through endless dating disasters. Perhaps you’re that person who just can’t seem to get a second date, and you’re wondering what it is you did wrong?

It’s not true. There are billions of people in the world, and so the chances are that  sooner or later you’re going to meet at least one that you hit it off with. Whatever our foibles, there will always be someone that finds them attractive.

To offer a little help along the way though, I thought I’d get personal and share some of my real life dating experiences, actual things that happened to me on first dates that meant a second was never on the cards and things I would suggest avoiding if at all possible:


Don’t take a phone call from your mum in the middle of dinner

Personally I don’t like to see a phone anywhere near a dinner table at any time, regardless of how many dates you’ve been on. I understand that sometimes there are emergencies, but answering the phone is a real turn off for me. The fact that one date answered a call from his mum did not add to his sex appeal.


Don’t bring your dog

Especially don’t bring your dog on a first date if your plan for said date is to have a barbeque at the side of a lake, a lake that the dog will swim in, before shaking himself off all  over your guest. Your guest who doesn’t even really like dogs. Just saying.


Don’t twiddle the hair on your mole

People have moles. That’s fine. Some people have quite large moles on their faces, which again, is not a big deal. Sometimes these moles have thick, dark hairs growing out of them, Nanny McPhee style, which is a little distracting across the dinner table but not the end of the world.


If you are on a date, can I please suggest not twiddling the hair on your facial mole in a thoughtful way as you speak? Not for the entire duration of the meal at least? You know it makes sense.


Don’t bring yoghurt as a gift

OK, so you might work for Yeo Valley, and some people might enjoy a bit of yoghurt, but it’s not sexy is it? To me it says ‘I bought you a gift in case you forgot to buy things for school packed lunches or are worried about your calcium intake and osteoporosis’. It does not say ‘you’re beautiful, intelligent, and definitely someone I want to take on a second date.’


And there you go, with those gems under your hat you’ve got no excuse for not having the best first date ever!


Jo Middleton is a mum to two girls and an experienced internet dater. Read more from Jo on her award winning blog, Slummy single mummy or follow her on Twitter for more bite sized updates.

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