Passion attracts passion


Women running passion

It’s human nature to be drawn to passionate people. Find your passion and don’t be afraid shout about it, says dating profile expert Rebecca Perkins

Being immersed in something you love and being passionate about what you do is highly attractive.

When people have deeply fulfilling work that they love or a hobby that they can’t wait to get home to pursue, their passion can often rub off on those around them.

While dating online and reading through profiles, it’s easy to spot the people who are actually in love with life, those whose passion jumps off the page.

I always encourage my clients to write with passion about what they love. Never feel you have to tone it down to fit in with what someone else may or may not think is appropriate. In fact, never tone down who you are. Being you, unapologetically, is something that I preach!

Radiators and Drains

We are drawn to people who inspire us, and you’re far more likely to connect with someone online when they’re passionate about something in their life. They might be an avid gardener who can talk you through exactly what they need to be doing in the garden at this time of year. And you might not be a gardener (yet), but how wonderful to be open minded enough to learn about their passion, to visit gardens together and learn something new. You might be a triathlete and become radiant when you talk about how you feel when you’re training. How magical to share that with someone who isn’t and might never be an athlete but still enjoys your passion and enthusiasm.

I wrote a blog a number of years ago entitled ‘Radiators and Drains’. Although not written with dating in mind, it’s very relevant when we’re talking about passion. Having a passion means that we’re more likely to be a radiator: someone who gives off warmth, someone who shines. We’re uplifting to be around and are more likely to be interested in other peoples’ passions and interests.

Find your passion

What do you love doing? What do you get so distracted doing that you look up and several hours have passed? It might be walking in the countryside, it might be writing poetry, baking cakes, sculpting, playing tennis, reading – whatever it is, write about it in your dating profile and I’ve no doubt that you’ll attract like-minded souls.

Read through your profile as if you were reading someone else’s. Do you get a sense of the real you from it? Does it make you want to know more or is it a bit bland? Don’t be mediocre. Share what brings you joy and happiness – what makes your heart sing? Remember you’re appealing to someone who ‘gets you’, someone who wants to spend time with you – the unapologetically real you.

‘But what if people think I’m too much?’ This is a phrase that I hear a lot from clients. My response: you’re not appealing to them are you, why would you want to date someone who wasn’t interested in you exactly as you are?

Be passionate about who you are, your life and how you want to live it. It’ll jump off the screen when someone sees your profile.

Rebecca is co-founder of Irresistible Dating which she set up with award winning dating photographer Saskia Nelson. Their expertise lies in guiding clients into the right mindset for dating success as well as helping them create a dating profile that stands out.

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