10 top tips for single dads dating
Are you a single father looking to get back out there? We’ve teamed up with DatingPriceGuide.co.uk to share some top tips for single dads dating again for the first time
Single dads dating again for the first time can find it confusing time for everyone involved. But we’re here to help. Here are a few key points to keep in mind when approaching the dating game with children in tow.
Speak to your children
Depending on the age of your children, make sure you let them know you’re dating. The last thing you want is for them to hear the news from someone else or meet a new girlfriend unexpectedly. Your children are your priority, after all, so your first thought should be to keep them happy. Reassurance will be key, especially for younger children. Let them know that they or their mother aren’t being replaced.
Keep children at a distance
Single dads dating can find it’s a puzzling experience for everyone, especially for children. Keep their contact with your dates as minimal as possible at first. When the time comes to meet your new partner, getting your children’s opinions will be vital and will help to reinforce the message that they are important and a part of this process too. Be cautious and don’t expect too much – they may not love her as much as you do straight away!
Only introduce long-term relationships
Avoid introducing your children to every date you have as this can harm their perception of relationships overall. They could get close to one of your dates only for them to disappear, which could make it difficult for them to get close to someone else you do get serious with.
Broaden your horizons
It’s unusually common for single dads dating to look for similarities to their ex in a new partner. If you can, try to broaden your horizons and look for someone with different life experiences. Treat your dating experience as a chance to get out and meet new people. Think of it as meeting new friends, not just love interests.
Forget your ex
Your new relationships are just that – new. New people, new situations, and a new life. Try to leave behind any bitterness you’re carrying from your past relationships and start afresh. And let’s face it; talking about your ex is only going to lead to an awkward situation – and no second date!
Focus on the future
Remember that your date has a past too so don’t be too quick to judge them. Mistakes will have been made on both sides so a fresh start might be just what you both need. Everyone has skeletons. Take your date as face value and see how it goes.
It goes without saying that if you’re on a date then they should already know you’re a parent. f they don’t, tell them – now! Everyone wants to make a good first impression on a date but if you’re worried about losing the relationship by revealing you have children, you’re in the wrong state of mind. If your date is looking for someone with no ties, you won’t be able to change their mind. Be upfront – it’ll make everything easier and stop anyone getting hurt.
The children come first
You might have to run out or cancel a date last minute , so your date must understand that your children come first. At the same time, make sure that you never give up spending time with your children in favour of a date. Children aren’t that naive, and they can often read situations better than you. They’ll pick up on it if you are choosing a date over them and it could harm your relationship with them long-term.
Patience applies to every situation. Be patient with your children, in particular. Take things slow and let them get used to the idea of dad dating. The worst thing you could do is a rush a new partner into your family situation.
No go to the sleepover
The simple rule is that sleepovers when the children are at home are reserved exclusively for ‘marriage material’ partners.
Juggling children and dating as a single dad won’t always be easy, but there’s no reason to think that starting a new relationship will affect your existing family ties. There are plenty of benefits to dating with children and most issues arise from a lack of communication. Keep an open mind and make sure to be as honest with your children as possible.
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