Why It’s Good To Be Weird

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“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken”. It’s easy to view this as another cheesy quote you see pasted over Instagram, but Oscar Wilde had a point, and when it comes to dating, it can’t be truer.

In a world where finding love has become so digital, it’s easy to find yourself preoccupied by what you think will make you appear most attractive to that one (maybe ‘the one’) on the other side of a smart phone. And even then when it gets to the fantastic point at which you’ve arranged a date, there come those awful nerves around suppressing that weird thing you do when you eat and the way you snort when you laugh.

But this is where I have to stop you, right there in your tracks.

If you’re one of those odd people, maybe a bit weird or a little silly…then congratulations, because you’re not ordinary.

Ordinary is boring isn’t it? No one wants to date – or fall in love – with someone exactly the same as them. Imagine how terribly terrible it would be if we socialised with friends who all shared imprint personalities, we’d get fed up in no time.

It’s our idiosyncrasies that ensure we stand out in a crowd and can be easily differentiated from hundreds of other people signed up to dating sites and apps all over the world, so own them.

Confidence is always hugely attractive in the opposite sex (though I draw the line at arrogance), and if you wear your little peculiarities like they’re a problem or feel any shame associated with them it’ll show. Hold your head high and be OK with your quirks and they’ll be seen as nothing more than endearing, whether they’re physical or unusual personality traits.

I once went on a date where the first thing the guy said to me was: “Gosh, you’re big aren’t you.” I was kind of mortified, I’m a curvy girl, although would never consider myself to be big, but I laughed. “You mean tall right?…..You can’t possibly be calling me fat on a first date can you? Or are you referring to my nose, because yeah, I guess that is kind of big too (I’ve always been massively insecure about this).” Luckily, he looked absolutely terrified at his mistake and apologised, it turned out to be a great icebreaker and the rest of the evening went really well.

I also have this weird thing where I don’t like different types of food touching each other on my dinner plate, I always make a joke of it when guys point it out, tell them it’s my weird thing…and now they know that, they can rest assured all my weirdness is used up and there’ll be no chance of me being a crazy girlfriend.

Be honest and upfront about your hobbies and interests, however geeky they may be, because why on earth would you want to try and change who you are and shape yourself to suit someone else, especially someone you’ve only just met. I can’t think of anything more exhausting than having to maintain some kind of act where I have to make out I workout six times a week and only eat clean, when in reality I consider cheese its own food group and my only motivation for going to the gym is so I can figure out how many calories I burned, then order a giant pizza equalling the same amount.

Newspapers, magazines, social media; they’re all crammed full of pictures of people that want to look the same or act the same in order to get a couple more ‘likes’, but none of it is real. We can fall for the idea of an extraordinary fantasy, but in the end it’s the total perfection of reality, with all its flaws, that we love.

Lauren Crouch is a writer and dating blogger. Read about Lauren’s dates (they all make good stories) on her blog nobaddatesjustgoodstories.tumblr.com or find her on Twitter @Crouchi.


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