Why you’re never too old to date
There is no age limit on dating or falling in love and no matter how old you are the desire to find that someone special can still burn just as strongly as it did when you were 20. The difference is that your hope that it will eventually happen may have faded because you mistakenly believe that you are past it. This is simply not true. Many people come to dating much later in life either because they have been divorced, bereaved or because they spent their younger life devoted to a career and never had time for romance. Not only will you find lots of potential matches in the same age group as you but older people often have a stronger likelihood of success than their younger counterparts for a number of reasons.
You know what you want
Young people have lots of big plans and grand ideas but it isn’t until later in life that we really work out what is important to us. Age also makes us realise things like good looks, flash clothes and status are only temporary and not the essential components for healthy, happy relationships. Far more important are personal qualities such as generosity, respect and kindness – things that will last long after all the glitz and glamour have faded and ensure that the relationship will give a lifetime of happiness rather than a season of fun.
You know yourself better
Part of the reason that young people can find it difficult to settle in relationships is because they are still on a journey of self discovery – they often don’t know who they are, what their values are or what they want to do with their life. As we age we come to know our strengths and weaknesses through having had to face lots of different life situations. We develop strategies for dealing with problems and are clearer about what we can contribute to someone else’s life rather than making extravagant promises which we may not be able to keep.
You have matured emotionally
Many people don’t mature emotionally at the same rate as they do physically – there are many young people who are emotionally mature and older people who are emotionally immature – but there is a good chance that at least some of the elements of emotional maturity will be present in older people. The ability to be objective, to see something from someone else’s point of view, to respond to facts rather than being overwhelmed by feelings – these all have more chance of having developed the more life experience we have had.
You are more appreciative of life
By the time we reach our mid forties most people have lost someone close to them – grandparents, parents, maybe even friends. The experience of loss often has a very grounding effect on our personalities as we face our own mortality. We become less likely to take people and things for granted and more likely to appreciate the good things in life. This can make us more open minded and inclined to believe that a relationship doesn’t have to be perfect in order for it to be happy and fulfilling – without the dark we wouldn’t appreciate the light.
You understand human nature better
Another gift of age and experience is the understanding that feelings aren’t facts and that they will pass – so if someone is angry it doesn’t mean they don’t want to be with you or that they are unhappy with the whole relationship, it means they are angry about something and they are expressing it. Being able to accept that everyone will have good and bad days, is capable of negative emotions like jealousy and hatred and aren’t bad people because they feel them makes us much more likely to be able to sustain a relationship even when the going gets tough. Often these lessons only come with age and experience.
Love can make you live longer
Not only are you never to old to date but dating can also help to ensure that you get to grow even older. Scientific studies have shown that love helps to keep your heart healthy, your blood pressure down and give you more emotional resources to overcome sickness and infirmity because people who have someone special in their lives are often more motivated to recover.
Whether it or not dating can help you live longer there is no doubt that love makes life worth living so it’s worth trying dating whatever your age.
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