A young woman sits on her bed writing in a notebook

20 questions: get to know yourself better

by Eharmony Editorial Team - September 28, 2010

Put aside an hour and really get to know yourself with our 20 essential questions.

The most important step in looking for a new partner doesn’t start with registering for an online dating site, or making sure you look good at the next party you go to. It starts with you. Or more precisely, knowing who you really are. After all, if you don’t know yourself, how can you be expected to choose a partner?

To help you out, we’ve put together these 20 essential questions to ask yourself.  When you’ve got a quiet hour or so try to answer each of these with a line or two’s response. You’ll be surprised at how much you learn about yourself.

1. Who is the most important person in your life? Explain why.

2. What do you most look forward to achieving in your life?

3. Think back to the most angry you’ve ever been. Who caused that anger and how?

4. Think back to the most loved you’ve ever felt. Who made you feel that way and how?

5. How do you feel in yourself – physically, emotionally and mentally?

6. What inspires you, and how do you feel when you’re inspired?

7. What is the most important thing in the world to you?

8. How would you want to spend your last day on earth?

9. What scares you?

10. Imagine you could only accomplish one more thing in your life – what would you want that to be?

11. What do you find boring, and why?

12. Is money important to you? Do you think about it a lot?

13. Does religion play a part in your life? If so, how?

14. What are your three biggest interests?

15. Do you have an enemy or a rival? If so, how did they get to that position?

16. Do you eat to live or live to eat? And is your diet something you control carefully?

17. Does life-long marriage seem like a wonderful or awful idea to you? And why?

18. Are you emotionally healthy? Which emotional areas could you improve and which are healthy?

19. Do you argue a lot with your friends and family? If so what is the usual result?

20. If you could write your own eulogy, what would the last sentence be?

Remember, these questions are about knowing yourself better. But, you may also wish to share your answers with a loved one to help them get to know you even better.