Alison Jane and Dan
Alison Jane: “I had just finished university and had moved back in with my parents whilst trying to find a job. I missed the social whirl of university and suddenly felt like I had no way of meeting new people, especially men. I could go to bars but that always seemed to end badly! So, I joined eHarmony and went on a few dates but no one particularly took my fancy. Then out of the blue, I got an au pairing job in Manhattan for three months, and I jumped at the opportunity! My life got exciting but there was a downside as I didn’t know anyone in New York and had no one to go out with in the evenings. I moved my eHarmony location to NYC - what a great feature!
I went on a lot of dates in New York, some good and some not so good, but I didn’t mind because I wasn’t expecting to find Mr Right in NYC; I just wanted to go out in the evenings and meet new people.
I met Dan at Union Square subway station after exchanging just a few messages. At first it was awkward; I had been on so many dates I was probably quite robotic at first, but when I ran out of pre-prepared lines it started to get interesting. We went for lunch, and then we went to linear park and then decided to for tea on the other side of Manhattan. We then went to see a movie, and then we sat in union Square Park until it closed. We were running out of things to do that were open that late so we went up the empire state building – which is where we had our first kiss. Throughout this time, conversation never ran dry.
We went on three more dates before I had to go back to the UK. I had neglected to mention that part to him, just as Dan had neglected to mention he actually lived in South Carolina, not New York! Before I left I wanted to see him one last time. When I found out he lived in South Carolina, within an hour I had rented a car and was on the road with a 10 hour drive ahead of me to see him. When I arrived I was exhausted, starving, and with a speeding ticket – and I only had about four hours to spend there before I had to start the drive back. I will never regret that trip though. I remember thinking that this first night we spent together would also be the last.
We kept in touch via Skype, and it wasn’t long before he was calling me every night. I had no intention of doing ‘long distance’, but I soon realised that when I came home from work all I wanted to do was talk to this guy on the other side of the world! We talked about anything and everything. Dan said he wanted to visit so we booked for him to come about a month later. Before he arrived, he asked me to be his girlfriend, so I went to the airport to meet my American boyfriend!
He stayed for a week and my parents loved him, and so did I. Before he left we had organised my next flight over in February. We have been flying back and forth ever since. We try to see each other every six weeks and I still get butterflies before I see him at the airport. In July, I went back to NYC to meet his parents, and they must have approved of me because he asked me to marry him! I am applying for PhDs in the USA and I hope to move over in less than a year when my contract at the University of Cambridge ends. Until then, we are still racking up the air miles and Skyping for hours each night!
Dan is everything I could have ever hoped for, he’s charming, sexy, loving, and intelligent and amazingly he seems to love me!”
Dan: “I joined eHarmony at the end of my first year of medical school in a small town in South Carolina. I was so busy with work I found it really hard to meet and therefore date people. I’d always believed that it wasn't the best idea to mix business with pleasure as far as my beginning medical career was concerned, so that wasn’t an option. In America, eHarmony is a very popular dating site so I figured I would give it a try.
I’d been on the site half heartedly for a while but by the time I got to my second year, I decided to sit down and go through my matches and really try to find someone I was interested in. Eventually, I had messaged and was planning to meet three girls, the first of which was Alison Jane. I had set my location as Staten Island, NY rather than South Carolina since I planned to move back there after medical school anyway and so didn’t see the point in finding a girlfriend in South Carolina.
I don’t like to talk to more than one girl at a time, so I didn’t arrange dates with the other two girls until I’d seen Alison Jane. It turns out that that decision was a wise one since I was captivated straight away by Alison Jane! After one date with her, there was no need to follow through with dating the other two girls. My first and only meeting from eHarmony turned out to be the only one I needed.
Although it was never said explicitly, I knew that Alison Jane wasn’t looking for anything serious and potentially was seeing other guys and I knew that I wanted to be the only person she saw, so I had to woo her. We had a great few dates for the period that we were both in New York.
The next week I got a call from Alison Jane saying that she had to return to England and she wouldn't be back in the states again. I was back in South Carolina at this time and I had to explain to her that I did not in fact live in NY. I was really upset that she had to leave as you may imagine and we discussed options on seeing each other one last time. For reasons I still don't understand, she offered to come to see me rather than me drive to see her. She drove through the night to see me and we spent a very short yet forever remembered day at my place.
That next morning she said goodbye; the feeling I had when I saw her drive away that day was one I'll always remember. It was as if every part of me was telling me to not let her go and if I did not act I would regret it. I knew that Alison Jane wasn’t up for a long distance relationship, but I was persistent. I had to play that game of not being too forward but forward enough to keep the chemistry we had in NY between us going.
We Skyped, texted, and kept in contact and it felt very natural to talk with her despite the fact she was miles across the Atlantic and I believe she felt the same way. It never felt forced or obligatory; it was natural, fun, and exciting. I eventually asked her if she'd like to be my girlfriend, made arrangements to see her at New Years in the UK, and today we are happily engaged and planning our future together.
Back in the day, I refused to date a girl because she was a 30 minute drive away from where I lived and now I am in a long distance relationship with a girl it takes 11 or so hours to get to via plane. It is really funny how the right person can make you change everything. To be honest, I did not know when I first flew over to spend New Year’s in the UK just how perfect Alison Jane was for me and I certainly would not have guessed we would be engaged today. I took a chance - one I'll never regret.”