Woman looks thoughtful and thinks "should I break up with my boyfriend?"

Should I break up with my boyfriend? How to know when to break up

by Ian Prior - May 26, 2021

Are you feeling stuck in a relationship and wondering should I break up with my boyfriend? Ending a relationship is a huge, emotional decision and is never easy. Here’s a list of signs that will help you figure out when to break up.

First, take a deep breath, reassure yourself that this is just a phase, and remember good times await. All relationships go through hard times when two different personalities are adjusting to one another. While rough patches in a relationship are completely normal, there are some warning signs and red flags you can’t ignore. Here’s what to look out for:

Should I break up with my boyfriend? 9 signs you can’t ignore

  1. There’s no trust or respect
    If your relationship lacks trust, respect, and stability it’s going nowhere. If you can’t trust your partner in anything they do or say, or if your partner is constantly doubting you, it is a sign of an unhealthy relationship that will not last. If you’ve tried and failed to trust your partner, or they are repeatedly breaking your trust, then it may be time to move on.
  2. You feel stuck in the relationship
    Do you often visualise a life without him and find it nicer and happier? Do you feel like you are in love with someone you no longer really like? Do you keep hoping he will change? If you are constantly sad around him, or if you feel alone even when you are together, then it’s a huge red flag.
  3. You often feel you’re in a one-sided relationship
    If you’re always the one suggesting dates, calling him, texting him, or making plans it indicates he isn’t willing to make the effort to keep the relationship fresh. When your emotional needs are not met and you are the only one working on keeping the relationship alive, these are surefire signs you should break up.
  4. Your values don’t match and your interest is dwindling
    Should I break up with my boyfriend just because we want different things in life? The answer is a clear ‘yes’ if your values begin to rub uncomfortably against each other. When passions and interests are too distinct to ever be settled without a drastic compromise, or if your life goals do not align, that’s when you have to leave a relationship.
  5. You have grown tired of the relationship
    If all your dates have become dull and when your every effort to make it fun is met with a general distaste, then that’s when to end a relationship. A massive warning sign that your relationship is doomed is when your partner just doesn’t excite you anymore – you don’t look forward to the dates, and you relish the idea of time spent away from him.
  6. You’re staying in the relationship due to some form of obligation
    If you are holding onto a relationship just because you have invested so much time in your partner or if you are staying back because you feel obliged, or you are scared of being alone then it’s time to break up. Because dragging such a relationship will only make you an unhappy person.
  7. Your life is on hold because of their choices
    The goal of a great relationship is to have fun together and an independently happy life. If you can’t pursue your passionsand your life isn’t progressing the way you envisioned it, that’s when to consider a break-up.
  8. You have a controlling partner
    Should I break up with my controlling boyfriend? This is one of the most glaring signs, where your partner is trying to control or dominate you. If your partner often makes you angry, miserable, or bored and you struggle to explain why you still love this person, it’s an obvious sign you should take your own path. If you feel suffocated and the negatives overshadow the positives, it’s time to move on.
  9. You’re not the version of yourself you like best
    This can be a tricky sign – and one you can only spot when you’re honest with yourself. Ask these questions: is your partner complementing your personality? Is he having a positive influence on you? If your answer is no then it’s time to call it quits. 

Should we stay together? Think before calling it quits

Relationships aren’t always rainbows and sunshine – the ups are thrilling but the downs can be so awful that you begin to wonder when to break up. But before you call it quits, pause and think.

This situation may not last forever. Whatever is bothering you, there are steps you and your partner can take to fix them up and work towards creating a healthier relationship together. Don’t give up too soon – arguments and fights and hard times don’t make your relationship; love does!

Should I break up with my boyfriend? Take action when the relationship is doomed

However, if you continue to stay in a bad relationship, you will never be at peace. If you fear being alone, then you should know being in an unfulfilling, tortuous relationship is much worse. A doomed relationship can never be fixed. It destroys not just your love life, but it can also adversely affect your professional life. It can cause your relationship with family and friends to suffer too.

So, should I break up with my boyfriend, if I can’t see a future together? The potential for a future with him should excite and not scare you. If it’s not exciting enough then such relationships don’t work down the road. Make a u-turn!

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Know your worth and move on for good

It’s unfair to your partner to linger on when feelings are gone. If you want a new chapter don’t wait for the page to turn itself. Don’t ignore these red flags – save yourself the time and heartbreak, and move on. If finding love again feels like a task, don’t worry. eharmony is coming to the rescue. With smart compatibility algorithms, unique filters, and robust communication features dating is going to be easy and fun. With eharmony, date someone who is worth your time and the one who complements your personality. Join today!

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