Woman on mobile smiles and has a phone date

Phone dates: a Convenient and Accessible Way to Connect 

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by eharmony Editorial Team - November 22, 2023

It might feel like a scene from an old movie, sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring. But everything old is new again and more and more people are finding that there’s a certain charm to going on a phone date. Let’s talk about things to consider before setting up a phone date, various phone date ideas, and of course, tips to make sure a phone date with that special someone goes well. 

Things to consider before setting up a phone date 

Since phone call dating is not longer very common, it’s natural to have doubts. A few aspects to think about before you suggest a phone date to your significant other:  

Calls or texts? 

Most people now prefer texting to calls and for good reason – texts give the other person time to respond and don’t interrupt their day the way a phone call might. However, it’s not exactly the most romantic method of communication, which is why you should consider asking that special someone on a phone date instead.  

Pros and Cons of Calls or Texts

Should you call or text? Let’s look at the pros and cons of texting and calling and offer a few tips on how to communicate better regardless of which you choose.

Should I call him or her? 

It’s normal to have nerves, even – maybe especially – when it comes to a phone date. If it’s someone you’ve just started to date, you might worry phone conversations are an intimacy you’re not ready for. If you’re in an already established relationship, you might worry that your partner might think a phone date is silly or old-fashioned, or that they’re not sufficiently intimate.  

What if he or she doesn’t call back? 

This is an especially big concern for anyone in the early stages of a relationship – you called, it seemed to have gone well, but now there’s only silence. What to do when he or she doesn’t call? Give your date the benefit out the doubt – he or she might simply be busy. If a few days pass with no response, try again – and if he or she still doesn’t respond, listen to the unspoken message and let the relationship go.  

All of that said, there are several reasons why a phone date is a great idea.  

  • It lets you connect even while being in different places or even time zones 
  • Being able to focus on someone’s voice can be really romantic 
  • Not having to look at each other means some conversations – especially hard ones – are easier  

6 Fun and creative phone date ideas  

So, what can you do on a phone date? Sure, you can just talk, and sometimes that’s fine. But with smartphones, there’s a whole world of fun phone dates ideas you can explore together:  

  • Watch a movie together: Put the phone on speaker and chat with each other while you watch. You could even both make the same snacks and have a little watch party 
  • Do a relationship questionnaire together: There are dozens of relationship questionnaires, from fun getting-to-know-you lists to collections of deep, personal questions. Pick one and go through it together – not only will you have fun, you’ll get to know each other better 
  • Binge a TV show … with a twist: Rather than just watching the show together, make a phone date for after you’re done with each episode. You can discuss what you thought of the episode, any theories you have for the next episode, what you’d do differently 
  • Have dinner: Just because you’re not in the same place doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a romantic dinner date 
  • Cook a meal together: Not a fan of phones at the dining table? Take them to the kitchen instead. Use Skype or Facetime so you can easily chat while cooking. As a bonus, you’ll end the call with something delicious! 
  • Go for a walk together: Talk on the go, whether that’s a park, your neighborhood, or even a museum or art gallery. While you should be aware of your surroundings – any danger aside, it’s probably best to keep any deeply personal topics for when you have privacy – walking and talking is a wonderful new spin on a traditional phone date 

Phone date etiquette:
8 tips to make a lasting impression 

Maybe you can’t remember the last time you were on the phone for non-business or family-related reasons. Here’s a quick list of phone date tips to ensure all goes well. 

  1. Carve out the time: Just as you would for a traditional date, make sure you have nothing else going on when a phone date is scheduled – anything else is rude and disrespectful
  2. Check your signal and wifi connection: There’s nothing worse than trying to have a deep conversation and having to keep repeating things because of a dodgy connection  
  3. Make sure there’s no background noise: There’s nothing worse than trying to listen to someone over the sound of the TV or traffic. Pick a quiet spot for your phone date 
  4. Have some activities ready to go: While spontaneity is great, having a list of things to talk about or do can avoid awkward silences
  5. Give them your full attention: Just like with a regular date, your focus should be on your partner    
  6. Remember it’s a date, not an interview: Dates should be fun, and a phone date is no different. Try to relax and put your partner at ease; the more relaxed you both are, the better the date will go   
  7. Keep your questions open-ended: One of the best things about a phone date is the chance for a real conversation. Ask questions that give your partner the chance to respond with more than just yes or no, and ask follow-up questions. If you need to, you can write down your questions before starting the phone date 
  8. Know when to end the call: If you come to a natural stopping point, let the conversation go. It’s better to have a short conversation that went well than a longer one that dragged on

Phone call dating lets you connect on a deeper level 

A phone date is a great way to connect with that special someone when getting together just isn’t possible. It will also help you stand out in a world where most people would rather text. Plus, there’s just something wonderfully romantic about getting to know each other this way. If you’d like to try it, eharmony is a great place to start – everyone on our dating site or app is looking for other eligible singles to form authentic and lasting connections with. Sign up today! 

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